Heart in her Mouth
by MillsBonn
Summary: After the death of Satine, Obi-Wan returns from Mandalore shattered. Anakin and Ahsoka try to come up with a plan to approach a devastated Obi-Wan, but a certain Senator turns out being the one to talk with Obi-Wan. Slight Obidala and Obitine.
1. The News

**Anakin POV**

"Ani, wake up! It's an emergency!" I here Padme bark.

The one thing I will attentively wake up to is that beautiful voice yelling for help. So pretty, but has such a need for help. Pretty wife plus wife that needs help equals more praise for me. And I like praise. Praise leads to a very fun aftermath.

"What's wrong Padme? Are you okay?" I yell half-awake.

"I'm fine Ani, but something has happened."

I sit on the bed and turn on the bedroom light, hoping that this so-called emergency doesn't involve me or our marriage.

"What is it, Angel?"

"It's about Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan. The last time I heard the words, "It's about Obi-Wan," Darth Maul had risen from the dead and Obi-Wan had crashed in some cargo ship in some mountainous planet and was in the hospital for two weeks. He was devastated.

"What's wrong with Obi-Wan? I say with fear.

"Satine died. Darth Maul stabbed her in the stomach. Rumor has it that Obi-Wan was right there when she died."

I stare with disbelief at Padme. I can't believe that Maul would kill Satine. How did he even get to Mandalore in the first place without anyone knowing?"

"You're kidding, right?"I ask to my wife.

"I wish."

As I stare at the ground mumbling something to myself I didn't even know, Ahsoka pulls up in her speeder to the sky patio.

"Ani, hid! Someone is-"

"It's Ahsoka, Angel. Remember, she knows already.

I run to Ahsoka's speeder and I can see the urgency on her face. I can also see that she forgot her lightsaber. Padawans.

"Master Skywalker, Senator. I fear I am the bearer of terrible news,"

"Satine?" Padme asks.

"I'm sorry, Senator. I knew you two were good friends."

As Ahsoka and Padme share a quick embrace, something comes back into my mind. Obi-Wan. He'll be miserable. Obi-Wan was sad enough when Maul came back, but now Maul murdered the woman he loved but refused to admit.

"Ahsoka, do you know where Obi-Wan is?"i ask.

"Yes, he returned to the Temple and delivered the word to the Council. Mandalore has asked for Republic help. A civil war has started on Mandalore. Troops are leaving as we speak, Master."

"Is Obi-Wan going with the fleet?" Padme asks.

"No, Senator. The Council doesn't want anyone that had previous relations to Duchess Satine to go with the fleet. Which means that none of us will go either," Ahsoka says.

"Well, we have another problem," I say.

"What is the problem, Ani?" Padme asks.

"Obi-Wan."


	2. The Plans

**Padme POV**

Poor Obi-Wan. Poor, innocent Obi-Wan. I've known Obi-Wan for a long time and he never deserved all of this. Ever since I knew Obi-Wan, he's been a wonderful man that didn't deserve to have his Master killed. Now, he loses Satine, the closest thing Obi-Wan ever had to love.

Now, don't get me wrong. It's not like Obi-Wan and I are very close friends. Sure, we talk sometimes. Obi-Wan and I sometimes sit down and talk about politics because we both enjoy mocking politicians. When Satine entered the pictured and I started supporting Mandalore, Obi-Wan and I often talked about his time on Mandalore. That's about all we do. I see Obi-Wan maybe once or twice a month.

But this.

Oh force, I can't ignore this and wait for Obi-Wan to come by to refuel his speeder. Someone has to come to him this time.

"Now listen, Ahsoka, I know how Obi-Wan will react to a Welcome Back Party. It wouldn't help at all. In fact, I'll just hurt him."

"Master, you deny everything idea I say. And some of those ideas were good."

Just four hours after we find out of the news of Satine's death, and Anakin and Ahsoka are already trying to come up with a plan to approach Obi-Wan. I have been sitting on the couch for three hours and no progress has been made in Anakin and Ahsoka's plan. If you can call arguing a plan.

"No Master, I don't think driving into his room is a good idea."

"Ahsoka, of course we shouldn't take him on a vacation to Mandalore. He'll just get mad at everyone and get extremely sarcastic."

"Why would we get him a speeder, Master? He would just crash it."

"We should prank him Ahsoka. A prank always gets someone in good spirits. Do you still have the exploding Qui-Gon statue?"

"I have five credits. We should go out to lunch, Master."

Oh yeah, I forgot I've been sitting on this couch since 04:00. Looks like time passed quickly while I was listening to stupid ideas and comments.

"I could go get lunch for the three of us. I'm pretty hungry too," I say in hopes to get out of the horrid place.

"Really, Angel?"

"Sure, I'll go to Dexter's or something and get take out," I say as I walk towards the self proclaimed planning group.

"Thank you, Padme," Anakin says as he kisses me on the forehead.

"You two keep planning. I'll be back with lunch soon.

I didn't go to Dexter's.

I went to the Jedi Temple.

i went to help Obi-Wan.


	3. The Arrival

**Padme POV**

I considered going to Dexter's. I heavily considered it. In fact, I'm hungry. Really hungry. But there are more important things right now. Important enough to skip lunch. Important enough to lie to a few very powerful people that can make you say things.

That is the roadblock. The Jedi. They can see why I'm there. That's the problem. Well, not the big problem, but it's a problem. I've seen what Jedi can do firsthand. And let me be the first to say that these people can to amazing things. Miraculous things. Scary things.

I went to the Temple. I tried to think of an lie to tell the Jedi. Maybe Senatorial business. Something believable. I thought I had to say something the moment I entered Temple grounds. Boy, was I wrong. I got to the front of the Temple and there were about 30 Jedi outside. Most of them helps prominent positions. I thought the last people in the galaxy that would gossip would be the Jedi. It didn't shock me that they were gossiping. It shocked me who they were gossiping about.

"He has no control over his emotions whatsoever!"

"Why would he go to Mandalore? It breaks every single rule we have."

"I blame him for the Duchess's death, I really do."

"Can't believe he's on the Council. I can name lots of other people that deserve his place in the Council. You can count them."

"The moment Qui-Gon was assigned to be his Master, it all fell down. He trained a terrible Jedi and now Skywalker is going to turn that poor little girl into an even worse Jedi!"

"He should be expelled from the Order. His emotions cloud him."

Who were these people? Are these the same people that have enough compassion to save the galaxy, enough good the wipe out all evil, so little selfishness that their deaths are borderline suicide, enough skills to lead thousands of men in battle. Are these the same people as my husband?

"Senator Amidala, you that is?"

In my train of thought and possible future procrastination, I hear a familiar voice behind me. Master Yoda.

"Master Yoda." I get out of my speeder to bow. "So good to see you."

"Good to see you too, it is. Yes." Master Yoda pauses for a moment. "But here to welcome me, you are not. No. A matter of the heart, it is. Yes."

Darn those Jedi. They can just see your soul.

"Yes, Master Yoda. I have come here for an audience with Master Kenobi. The recent events on Mandalore…"

Think, Padme. Think, think, think! Your on the Senate. You have to make last minute choices with no evidence. You ruled a planet for eight years. You can think for a reason to be here. A lie/reason. Think Senate, think Senate.

"There is a chance that the Senate might go into discussion on the events on Mandalore to come up with a plan on how to handle the situation. Since Master Kenobi was there, I would like to talk to him to gather more information on the ordeal."

"Have to lie to me, you do not. Know why you are here, I do. Here to help Kenobi with his emotions, you are. Friends, you two are."

"Yes. Ever since the Trade Federation blockade on Naboo, Master Kenobi and I have remained in distant contact. As friends, of course."

"Excuses need to make, you do not. Come. Come. To Kenobi, I will take you."


	4. The Prison

**Narrator**

Before we get back to the Senator, shift your minds for a moment. Somewhere deeper. Somewhere where emotions lie. Emotions that can't be shown even though they was to escape from their prison. The prison that is called Obi-Wan Kenobi.

The prison lies in a dark room all alone. He is laying on his bed, thinking about what happened. Thinking about what is to come. Knowing what is to come. Life will continue on as normal for him. Probably in a week, he'll be sent on a mission. He will most likely succeed on the mission. But he will always remember a failed mission. The failed mission.

Some may call that mission a Republic has been looking for every way possible to get control of Mandalore. He will been seen as a hero. The one that brought Mandalore to the Republic. But they don't know what really happened.

Murder. Brutal murder. The young, the old, the middle-aged. All innocent. And it was his fault.

Yes, he blames himself. He out the target on his back. He should of captured Maul or cut his head off. But Maul lived. Maul murdered a planet, a lifestyle, because of him. He blames himself.

Some could argue that he is guilty. Guilty of all this horror. Guilty of the murder. Some could argue that he is innocent. Never knew that this horror would live. Never knew that this murder would happen. But no one would think about his emotions. He's a person too. He feels like you do. He has a nature and habits like you do. He isn't a tool in a war.

People would say they're sorry. People would say they can relate. But for what reason; to gain his approval later, so they would have a reason for him to help.

"But no one really cares," he heard a voice in his head say.

"I'm just a Jedi. I shouldn't be like this."

"Wake up Obi-Wan! Wake up!"

"What would Satine tell you do to?

Oh Satine. It's his fault she's gone. He would never forgive himself for this one. His only true love. His only heartfelt purpose.

'It's your fault," the voice cried.

"It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault."

That was a voice. Those were the words. Those were his thought. That was a sound that would never leave his head again. It just kept going and going and going.

Forever.

And ever.

And ever.

Even on the day Anakin became a man again.

Even in the stars where he was forgiven for something that he never really did.

That voice would somehow be there forever.


	5. The Walk

**Padme POV**

As Master Yoda and I walked through to Temple, I could hear more talk of Obi-Wan's decision to go to Mandalore. Almost all of it bad. As we walked through, I kept getting more and more shocked by what was happening. Gossip. The Jedi gossip? Gossip!

"Know what you are thinking, I do."

Here we go again.

"Master Yoda?"

"A Jedi, you need not be to hear the opinions of others. Shocked you are by the comments of others,"

"I must admit, it is quite shocking to hear so many people talk about one event in such a negative tone. Especially Jedi. I always thought Jedi never gossiped about anything."

Master Yoda chuckles.

"Master Yoda, with all respect, I don't think this is something funny."

"Funny the situation is not, funny the thoughts of the others. Yes, yes. Think disobeyed our Code Obi-Wan did."

"But Master Yoda, since a Jedi can't have attachments, isn't what Obi-Wan did breaking the Code."

"Depends on point of view, it does. Sole purpose to help the Duchess, it was not. To help Mandalore, it was also. See this, most do not. In the room when the transmission was received, I was. Heard his exact purpose, I did."

"So, why didn't the other Jedi help?"

Master Yoda pauses and looks at the ground. He stares at the ground for a few moments and then looks straight.

"Know why, I do not," he says as we continue walking.

I don't need to be a Jedi to know what he was thinking. All that time ago, when there was still a Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan didn't have a beard, the Jedi did help Mandalore. For a whole year, the Order sacrificed one of their most prominent Masters and his padawan to help a neutral planet. Today, that would be out of the question. The war has changed everything, even the most fearless of souls.

As we continue walking through the Temple, we start to pass through areas I don't recognize. Considering that the doors aren't far apart from each other and there are lots of Jedi roaming around, this must be the quarters. We are getting close.

"Master Yoda, are these the sleeping quarters?"

"For new knights and padawans, these are the quarters. Higher ranking Jedi and masters sleep closer to the roof. Far, we are not. Think about what you will say, you should do. Being slow is not appreciated in the Temple, yes."

As we enter the elevator, I take Master Yoda's advice and start thinking about what I should say. What should I say? What do you say to a person that just lost someone dear to him? His lover. Is it possible to plan that?

I come to a conclusion about three things as the elevator arrivals at its destination:

Yes, it is possible to plan what I will say.

Yes, I could take a Jedi Master's advice.

No, I will not do any of the things I thought and I will just see what happens.

Master Yoda gestures where Obi-Wan's door is and heads back down the elevator. He gives me a kind wave as the elevator door closes. I look at Obi-Wan's door for a few moments and take small steps towards the door. I remind myself not to think about what I should say. I just have to speak from the heart.


	6. The Mirror

**Obi-Wan POV**

"Its your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's all your fault."

That never-ending voice in my head sounded just like me. But weaved with my voice. I heard other voices. Qui-Gon, Xantos, Maul, Dooku, Grevious, Savage, Anakin, Ahsoka, Mace, Luminara, Peel, Kit, and of course, my darling Satine. But there was another voice. A voice I had never heard. Everything about that voice was dark. Evil. Malicious. Deceptive. Heart-breaking. Murderous. Deadly. A voice that made me want to cry even more than Satine's.

Sometimes I hear the voice when I'm nervous or alone. It's been there since I took Anakin as my padawan. I've always thought it was my other side, my dark side. A side of me that wants to take over. I have talked about it with others Masters, and they told me the same thing I thought. For some reason I don't think it's a darker side of me.  
But there was one more voice I heard. It wasn't from my head.

"Obi-Wan, can you hear me?"

I turn around and I see a figure standing. The room is too dark to see her details. I think it's a she. It has to be a she.

"Who's there?" I ask.

"Padme Amidala."

"The Padme that fell out of the battleship on Genosis?"

"Yes that Padme. Where's your light switch?"

"To the left of you against the wall."

As the light turns on, I look around me. My quarters were a complete mess. Uniforms thrown everywhere from my breakdown this morning. Chairs flipped from my epic floor beating at 09:00. Sheets on the wall from something I don't remember. A Senator standing in my quarters. Then I look in the large mirror opposing me.

Boy, did I look terrible.

Let's starts with the hair, shall we?

My beard was a mess. There was dirt or something brown wadded in there. Hairs in my beard were flying up in random directions. There was a random spot of skin where some beard was way back two hours ago. My head hair was just as bad. Somehow in less than a day in my quarters I gave myself dreadlocks. Some dreadlocks were defying gravity. One was sticking straight up. Anakin always said my hair was a special situation.

Now with the skin.

I was completely shirtless. My whole stomach was bruised and had scratches everywhere. My legs were even more bruised, thank Qui-Gon I was wearing my pants. My back was even worse. To add to the collection of scars, there was at least 5 cuts at least an inch deep. Bruised everywhere; it hurt to look at.

And my face.

Oh force, my face.

My face was all wrinkled. It looked like I had aged 20 years. The tears softened my face so much. There were black, not grey, but black bags under my eyes. My eyes had lost all the glow they once had. Now they were almost grey. Satine once said my eyes looked like Mandalorian pigment.

"Obi-Wan, do you need a moment alone before we talk."

Talk. Talk about what? Politics. The political point of murder. Talk about the wonderful chandelier in the palace that Satine got murdered in. Talk about the armor of the Deathwatch that I disguised myself in. Talk about what Satine said. Her orders. Her final words.

"What do you want?" I ask about to blow my top if I hear anything about politics.

"I want to talk to you about what happened on Mandalore."

What happened on Mandalore. What happened on Mandalore! She might of asked, "Hey Obi-Wan, remember when you got severe cuts on your thighs on Genosis and they got majorly infected and you had to have four massive surgeries. Could you please relive that so the Senate can take observations?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Obi-Wan, I'm here to-"

"I SAID I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," I YELL," I'VE SEEN ENOUGH OF MANDALORE AND I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT! NOW GO!"

There is a short pause between us.

"I'm here to make sure your okay…," Padme says in half shock/half fear.

Someone came? For me?

"Oh Padme. Oh my force Padme," I choke out as I begin to cry.

Instead of coldness, I find warms arms around me.

Instead of loneliness, I find someone there for me.

Instead of prison, I find freedom.


	7. The Talk

**Padme POV**

The only other Jedi I saw cry before was Anakin. Not even on Genosis Obi-Wan cried. He just moaned and screamed. Jedi aren't supposed to have attachments, but I don't believe that. Attachments bring out what a person really is, attachments help release pain and fear. Jedi are supposed to be fearless, but no one is truly fearless. Not even Obi-Wan. The moment Obi-Wan started crying, my heart broke for him. I cried at Qui-Gon's funeral and I barely knew him. Obi-Wan had a straight face the whole time. I had to hug Obi-Wan when I saw him cry; it was an instant reaction. He cried maybe for about five minutes before getting it together again.

"I'm sorry Padme," he sniffles, "You shouldn't of seen that," Obi-Wan says as he gets himself back together and puts on his undershirt. "I… I overreacted and I'm sorry I screamed at you. It wasn't right. It was…it was," Obi-Wan says as he starts walking towards the window.

I know exactly what it was in Obi-Wan's mind.

"Not Jedi like…?"

Obi-Wan pages for a short moment. I don't need to be a Jedi to know what his is thinking. He's thinking about his life which has been composed of four main things: Friends, War, Code, and Loss. Lots of things in the loss category also fall in the friends category.

"Ya, not Jedi like," he agrees sadly.

I don't think at all about my next question. I have decided today to have no filter whatsoever. Which is the exact same thing as being Anakin for the day. And that is always interesting.

"Who are you, Obi-Wan?"

He pauses for a moment in the center of the room; taken back by my question. Obviously confused, he thinks for some moments as I slowly inch closer towards him awaiting the answer.

"Well, um," he says as he sits on the chair nearest to him slowly, "I am a Jedi Master on the Council and a Jedi General in the Clone Wars. My padaw-"

"Oh Force Obi-Wan, not that you! Come on! That isn't you! That's what everyone else thinks and if you think that too your even stupider than the rest of them!"

I take a few moments to let what I said sink in. Not just him, but both of us. I thought about Obi-Wan the way he did until he cried. Does that count as being hypocritical?

Obi-Wan, obviously extremely shocked by my question and outburst stares at the ground for a few moment. He covers his mouth with his hand and slowly moves his hand up to his forehead. Obi-Wan then puts his hands down on his lap and lowers his head.

"I'm an orphan. I never knew my parents," he says softly and sadly, "They said that my brothers and sisters left me in a basket when I was a week old. There was a note," he says as he gets up out of the chair and towards his dresser. Obi-Wan than opens the lowest drawer and takes a box out. He opens the box and takes a folded piece of paper out and hands it to me.

 _Dear Whomever is reading this,_

 _In this box lays a week old infant, our brother. His name is Obi-Wan Kenobi. He was born in the Underworld to Kin-Lo and Missava Kenobi. They were our parents. When the doctors saw my brother lift everything in the hospital room without even touching anything, we were instantly kicked out. The doctors told use he was dangerous and needed to be kept secret for our safety. My parents then went to another doctor and told them of what had happened. We were all waiting outside the room when our parents were talking. We then saw the doctor murder our parents after the parents refused to hand over Obi-Wan to the doctor, who I believe wanted to ransom Obi-Wan off to your Order. We all ran out of the hospital and hid for one day. We then heard of this place that knew what to do with Obi-Wan and would protect him. We decided to make sure he was safe and bring him here. If we don't see him again, we will be fine as long as we know he is safe. If you do not want him, please give him back to us. Our contact information is below._

 _Thank you,_

 _Pimya, Jon-Lo, Werner, and Ime-Lai_

"Master Yoda said when they tried to pick me up from the basket at the Temple steps, I cried and everything rose, including the people. After that, they knew to keep me and tried to contact my brothers and sisters. They couldn't, so they searched them down. When they found them, all four of them were dead. The Order arranged for a grave in the forests on Stewjon, where my parents are from."

What do I say to him now? What do I do to heal the wounds? I shouldn't bring Satine into this yet. Not now, but later. Turns out, I'm speechless now.

"I'm a Padawan too."

The comment takes me very off guard. Confused, I give Obi-Wan a look.

"You ask me who I was, remember?"

Guess I was so caught out in that letter I forgot.

"Oh, yeah. Go on."

"I never really finished my training. I was still a padawan when Qui-Gon died. He said I was close to being Knighted, but I still wasn't done. Qui-Gon said to the Council on the eve of his death that I still had much to learn of the living force. I didn't learn much about the living force between that meeting and his death. Since I didn't finish my training, Anakin didn't finish his training and neither will Ahsoka. I blame myself for that."

"How can you blame yourself for that?" I ask curious.

"I could of saved Qui-Gon. During the battle…I could of. I remember I fell down. I held on to the platform. I was just thinking and I got lost in the moment and the worst time. I fell behind. I could of been closer and saved him. I killed him. I failed generations of padawans."

There is a long pause between us. Both of us look at the ground, waiting to see who will talk next. I don't want to talk. That's my point. If I don't talk, maybe Obi-Wan will realize what he has and how wonderful he really is.

"I am single."

I can't help but laugh when he says that. I immediately cover my mouth in respect, but I find Obi-Wan laughing to. He puts his hands through his hair and starts laughing on the ground.

"I've always wondered what it would be like to be married. Not even married, just be able to love unconditional, you know. I can't though, I'm a Jedi."

"Obi-Wan, I know you aren't allowed to love unconditional, but think about what you have. You have so much, Obi-Wan. So much. Too much to be doing this. You can be sad, you can. Everyone would be sad. Not sad, devastated."

"I am devastated,"Obi-Wan says out of the blue. I look at him and he looks at me. "I truly am right, I do have a lot and thank you for helping me realize that," Obi-Wan says and puts his hand over my hand, "Satine, she was the only one left from my past. The last bit of my childhood. The…the…," Obi-Wan pauses for a moment and looks at the sky briefly. "I was planning that after they war, when Dooku was defeated, when the Republic has control, I…I…I…wanted to get…"

"Married?" I infer.

"Married." Obi-Wan confirms.

For five minutes there is complete silence. No noise, no nothing. Just two people awkwardly staring in all directions. The Jedi and the Senator. It always ends up like that. Every single time.

"Uh, about your last comment," Obi-Wan says, "I do have a lot. Thinking about it. I have a ambitious padawan, his wild padawan, lots of friends here in the Temple, people to lean on from outside the order, and you, of course," Obi-Wan says as we both chuckle for a few seconds. "But best of all, I have the memories. All the memories of everything. I can look back on them. I'll smile, I'll laugh, and I'll cry. But at least I have them."

We look at each other and smile. Then we laugh.

"Goodbye, Obi-Wan."

"Goodbye, Padme."

As I walk out the door and Obi-Wan starts picking things off the floor, I remember my plans with Anakin and Ahsoka in a few days. A nice dinner in a restaurant with the best view of the planet. Just us and whoever else wants to come.

As I enter the doorway, I turn back and look at Obi-Wan. He looks so much happier than he did ten minutes ago.

"Um, Obi-Wan?"

Obi-Wan looks at me,"Yes?"

"Anakin, Ahsoka,whoever else wants to come, and I are going to the best restaurant in the planet, maybe even the galaxy! If you want to come…?"

Obi-Wan looks the other way and drops the pillow he was holding. Obi-Wan looks at me with some denial like I was kidding.

"Really? You mean me?"

"is your name Obi-Wan Kenobi?"

"Yes, it is."

Obi-Wan looks at me for a moment and then the mirror.

"Of course. I will be there. Thank you for the invitation, Padme."

"I expect to see you there, Gener-"

"And thank you for everything else."

I look back one more time at Obi-Wan. He's obviously sad. Depressed. Alone. Heartbroken. But he's happy. He's free. He's cured. Not fully but, the wounds are closing. Not just Satine, but everyone else. They're all a little more healed. You can see it in his face. His eyes, they look like diamonds again.

Not diamonds. Crystals.

Mandalorian crystals.

"Your welcome," I say as I head out the door.


	8. The Goodbye

**Obi-Wan POV**

I step out of the illegal transport for all the crooks, bounty hunters, and Jedi. I quickly run off after paying the pilot. I know this is the last time I'll come to this planet. I know this is my last chance to thank her. The Empire will be coming to Naboo soon and I can't be there when they come. They'll come for Mandalore later, I have time. This is my only chance to say bye to her.

Even though there is a shrine for her in the capital, her really tomb is behind a waterfall. The steps are hidden by trees and the glowing water that falls. There is a cave hall with flowers and carvings in the wall. Then I follow the hall to a beautiful room. The room is filled with things she loved. Her wedding dress, her journal, some of her favorite foods, pictures of her family and friends, and so much more. Two statues of angels holding candles stand on both sides of her tomb. Her tomb has see through glass on the top. The fake pregnancy bump has been taken out, but everything else remains the same. Her face is motionless, her hair is perfect, her makeup is beautiful, and the pendant in her hand carries the same message.

 _"_ _There is still good in him. I know there's still go-"_

The pendant talks. It tells a story. A story of a politician and a Jedi. I know that story. I know that story too well. I lived that story. I lived that story with Duchess Satine of Mandalore. At the end of the politician and Jedi story always ends the same, the politician dies and the Jedi goes through a living hell.

"You helped me out of hell, Padme," I say to the beautiful corpose, "I wish I could help you out of yours."

I look at Padme and many things come to mind. The girl that revealed herself to Boss Nass as a Queen, the girl that climbed on the top of the pole so cleverly on Geonosis, the girl that ways always on the right side of every debate, the girl that helped me in my darkest times, the girl that died of a broken heart.

"Remember when you came to me when Satine died? Right before Ahsoka left? You came to me. I thought you where there for politics, but you were there for me. You actually talked to me. You held me when I cried and asked me who I was. Even Anakin wasn't there that day. Well, he came later with a bucket of food a few hours later, but still. You sat down and cared. You help me let out my past and I failed to repay you for that."

I could saved him, I should of saved him. Anakin. Once my brother, now my enemy. My torturer. My final heartbreak. My fault. Yes, yes, Darth Vader is my fault. All this horror, all this death, all this loss is my fault. It goes back to the battle on Naboo. I could of jumped up quicker. Qui-Gin could of taught Anakin. Anakin would of turned out so much better.

 _"_ _It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault. It's your fault."_

That voice has been in my head recently. Ever since I saw the videos of Anakin killing the younglings, the voice has been there. Hasn't got away since. I look at Padme. I remember what she said to me all the time ago. Well, wasn't that long ago.

 _"_ _How can you blame yourself for that?"_

I could blame myself. I could. But what would Padme want me to do. Drown in guilt? Padme knew what really happened. She knew it wasn't my fault, even I though it was and still do. Padme knew and insisted in was a chain reaction and that I happened to be caught somewhere in the chain. I can't admit she's right because i'm a human. The human that seemed to be caught in the middle of every disaster.

"Padme, the twins are safe. Leia is with Bail Organa. I received a hologram from him and he showed me Leia. She looks just like you. Brown eyes, thick brown hair, the details of her face. But when I saw her, there was something that looked so Anakin. I don't know what it is. Luke is with Anakin's brother-in-law and his wife on Tatooine. He won't have the best life in the galaxy, certainly not as good as Leia's, but if he's anything like his parents, he'll power through. I am exiled not to far from where Luke lives, I'll take care of him. The kid's pretty strong with the force, both of them, but Luke is amazingly strong. As strong as Master Yoda, I would say. Looks a lot like his Dad. If anything, those two will save their father and the galaxy, I'm sure of it. Just like you took care of me when Satine died, I'll take care of your children."

I know Padme won't respond. She won't smile. It kills me. Talking to someone just to let your feelings out, assure them that they're okay when they are already gone. I just have to say something to her one last time. Tell her what will happen. Tell her that her final words just might be true.

"When I heard you were going to Mustafar to chase after Anakin, I knew there was a chance you may never return. I went to your apartment right before you left and asked your handmaidens where you kept special items, told them you had asked for it. They gave me a box," I say as I pull out the golden box from my bag, "This box. I looked inside once. Padme, there are beautiful things in here. Anakin's padawan braid, a necklace with the Nabooian symbol on it, your crown from when you were queen, your wedding band that you hid from the world, a rock which I have no idea of it's importance, and a few pictures. I got my special box too when I last went to the Temple. I found something in it that you should have," I say as I open my simple, wooden box and find the bracelet made on Mandolorian crystal with a heart on it. I put the whole bracelet against my forehead once more and take out my lightsaber and cut the bracelet in the middle of the heart.

"This bracelet was Satine's favorite. She said it was her replacement for me when I gone on missions. What a silly thing to do, isn't it?"

No response. Sadly, no response.

"I know you and her were amazing friends. Even though you were on separate sides, you two were amazing friends. Whenever I found time to see her, Satine always talked about how wonderful you were. I though maybe you would want a memory of her and me. I'll keep one half, and you can keep the other. I'll put it in your box."

As I put the bracelet in Padme's box, I realize that my ride back with be leaving soon. At the break of dawn. I lay the bracelet down next to Anakin's braid and close the box. I stand up and put the golden box into one of the angel's arms.

"You know, Anakin told me long, long, ago that he mistook you for an angel when he saw you for the first time on Tatooine. I don't think that was a mistake. You really are an angel. So kind, selfless, beautiful, funny, amazing. You help people when they need it the most and know exactly what is right. Thank you for what you did to the universe."

I open the glass casket top and kiss Padme's forehead. I feel her skin with my hand. So cold. It shatters me to the point where some tears fall form my face. She was too good to deserve this, she was to innocent. Padme may have been the beginning of Anakin's fear, but how was that her fault. All Padme wanted was love. Anakin's love. I close the glass top and start walking towards the exit. I look back one more time before I leave and say one last thing to the once energy-filled Senator.

"Goodbye, Padme Amidala."


End file.
